Blog/News 2018-10-29T17:58:31+00:00

A journey from “With” to “Versus”

July 9th, 2019|0 Comments

In recent past, I have been crunched with the struggle of claiming guardianship for my two wonderful sons. While working on some custodial papers, my eyes stopped at a line which read mine and my ex- husband names as versus. I immediately felt the pinch, my heart stopped for a while as I recalled our wedding invitation card which had our names as “with”. I pondered the entire week on the fact that how the “with” turns into “versus” in many of the human relationships. It can be between an employee & his/her employer, husband & wife, siblings,manager & team,father & son etc. What we start to build together starts cracking and most of the times, we are deaf , mute and numb to feel the need to heal these cracks till we finally hear the loud bang of it crashing completely. The journey from “with” to “versus” transforms us completely. A part of us dies, we find it appropriate not to trust people, we fear building relationships and as a sum of all this we knowingly or unknowingly destroy our faith. Then, with every person we meet, we have two kinds of conversations, one that we actually have and one that we think we are having.. the later being more convincing to us because its a reflection of the journey we had traveled. You must have given all your best to a job or a relationship but in life nothing is to last forever. Life itself is temporary, so if at any point you fail; DONOT cast the shadows of your failures & tears on yourself. Learn to live for what today has to offer, not for what yesterday has taken away. If life changes your “with” to “versus”… remember the grace, the pride, the comfort that you had enjoyed when you were with each other. The same employer whom you hate today because they did not value your efforts was once your pride. The same partner that has walked over you today was once your companion.The same manager whom you are calling bad names today was once the pulse of your team. So, if today when you are standing opposite to things or people that were once WITH you, remember to reflect your own dignity not their character . Its only when things come to an end, we start remembering everything frame by frame and think of a 1000 different ways we would have done things differently; but then its all a theory and we can never test it. Life does’nt give us a chance to go back and edit. The life that we all imagine of living is always so much better and so much appealing than the one that we actually live; its when we want our imagination to become the real one… that is where the equation changes. In this process, we experience different human behaviors and react , respond and make choices. We juggle our thoughts and focus our energies on something that we [...]

Your Life is a timeless classic, Value it!!

July 2nd, 2019|0 Comments

I am not the only one who is obsessed—or writing…It may not be true that “the three most written-about subjects of all time are Jesus, the Civil War, and the Titanic,” as one historian has put it, but it’s not much of an exaggeration. Since the early morning of April 15, 1912, when the great liner went to the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean, taking with it five grand pianos, eight thousand dinner forks, an automobile, a fifty-line telephone switchboard, twenty-nine boilers, a jewelled copy of “The Rubáiyát of Omar Khayyam,” and more than fifteen hundred lives, the writing hasn’t stopped. But today Im not writing about the movie Titanic but using this largest ever built ship, widely admired for its triple-propeller design, and declared by the press to be “unsinkable” as my theme to express the value of human relationships and words. In a world where vows are worthless. Where making a pledge means nothing. Where promises are made to be broken, it would be nice to see words come back into power and relationships breathe their virtue. I left every royalty of my family name to keep the promise of togetherness that I made with the man I had loved so much. I spent the glorious, beautiful years of my life making babies with him and building a home. Alas, someone from either of us failed and togetherness withered away. My life was a fairytale and I always longed for a happy ending.. But all fairytales have rules, and perhaps it’s their rules that actually distinguish one fairytale from the other. These rules never need to be understood. They only need to be followed. If not, what they promise won’t come true. But like every fairy tale, I am also gifted with priceless possessions… my two adorable sons! I made a promise to always stand by them, to hold them up when they’re about to fall, and to always keep them safe. I never believed there was a strength out there for me. Until I had them. They changed everything. And I never want to live without them. I love them more than I ever thought possible. Linking Titanic again… the success of this movie was also its superb talented cast. God has written your story and its beautiful, it may be tragic for some but a conviction for many to keep promises and that life must go on. Your story also has a unique cast… your selfless parents, true friends, wondrous siblings, amazing children and a beautiful partner. The events may shake you, drown you but the experiences will be intense making your life story a timeless classic and an epic masterpiece. Pain of the past never goes away, you just find a way to deal with it. And in the future……. all the promise it holds…. that’s what keeps you moving forward, and out of the darkness. Remember the last words of dying Jack :”Rose, listen to me. Winning that ticket was the best thing that [...]

Leadership is to Engage Hearts..

November 12th, 2018|Comments Off on Leadership is to Engage Hearts..

One of the key tasks of an extra-ordinary leader is to engage hearts. Too many principles and mission statements are put around the workplace for employees but not many resonates with their hearts. The disconnect that people have with their organization leads to declining monetary results and demotivated work force. Leadership is not about popularity, it’s about integrity; it’s not about power, it’s about purpose and it is the primary task of every leader to transform workplace into a place of realized genius. I worked for a company where the country head focused on numbers only. Within few years, he had taken the company to higher revenues but his lack of commitment with the growth and development of employees was paving way for an ultimate disaster in the future. Within few years, the company stood as number one in demotivated staff, a lifeless workplace, lack of trust in leadership , every person for himself (a bunker mentality) and the numbers started to fall. Soon the stories of disengagement of employees started spreading. And then the need of visionary leadership was identified. This new leadership (of which I was also a part) changed the gears. Employee engagement became the number one priority. Everyone was given a clear sense of future vision and they could relate their growth in company's growth. The managers stood by their teams, started taking the ownership of every good and bad deliverables of the team, instilled passion within all the employees by engaging their hearts and minds. Teams were appreciated for their good work, top talent were exposed to corporate leadership and concrete plans were put together for their career development. Employees were liberated to dream big for their future and the leaders helped them to move up the success ladder. It was no more a place where people would come to work just to pay their bills,it emerged as a powerhouse where lives were transformed from good to great. The brilliance of empathy and the spark of shared vision spilled over the entire organization and today the baton is passed to a new set of leaders and they are doing a magnificent job. They are not only living the values and the passion that was once instilled but are making it even better. It is important for us as managers, as leaders to inspire our teams to own the company's vision as theirs and invest their energies in it. We need to give them the clarity of our goals and also make them understand the implications. We as leaders should compliment our teams by truly listening to them. Either you will be given a bright idea for brilliant business results or you will discover the weakness that needs to be addressed before it erodes the entire system. Lubricate your leadership skills with compassion and respect for every single person that you come across every single day of your work week. REWARD people of their hard work and RECOGINISE their undying passion to deliver the best. I [...]

From Obligated and Burdened to Liberated Living

November 5th, 2018|Comments Off on From Obligated and Burdened to Liberated Living

Life is a jigsaw puzzle with most of the pieces missing, Life is a roller coaster ride, Life is a mystery and goes a list of metaphors that gives us a dull shade of life . Once shopping with my sons, we noticed that all the stores are decorated for upcoming Father’s Day. My younger son who was 7 yrs old at that time saw everything and asked his elder brother .."what should we buy for mama on Father’s Day". This one question sparked me with the thought that this little guy has more acceptance towards life than many of the adults. He could have felt bad, be envious of the kids who are blessed with good fathers etc but he chose to celebrate the day with what he is blessed with. Even the saddest of times makes your life richer. In my college days, I was a volunteer to patient care and I noticed that it wasn’t uncommon for people to have a swift burst of energy just before dying. Terminal men and women who were lethargic or unresponsive suddenly wanted to sit up, get up, or even try to walk around. Close friends and family members were elated, only to come in the next day and find that their loved one had declined and died shortly afterwards. It always reminded me of a light bulb at the end of its life – how it gets a blast of intense light just before fizzling out. One scientific explanation of the death of a light bulb states: When the tungsten in the light bulb filament reaches the point where it cannot handle the current anymore, because too much of it has vaporized off, it momentarily has a higher amount of current go through it, just before it separates (burns out). From many hours of giving a steady glow, it dies in a last burst of energy flowing through it – more energy than it can handle. When someone who was dying experienced this, I always had an urge to tell their loved ones not to miss saying something important – maybe one last goodbye while they were lucid and alert.   No one wants to fail . So most of us don’t even try. Fear, shame & defeat will stop you from believing in your own compass while dealing with your job, family or friends. Authenticity & clarity breeds success. Life is a skill, you have to be outrageously energetic to enjoy everything that you meet on the way. Imagine what life might look alike with the endless opportunity for growth? Keep clearing space within yourself for what matters most. Believe in yourself to mature to the sound of your own inner voice.   The Full Journey Enjoy your job / business, essence it with your passion & yield results; build relationships, compliment the good, voice for the right, spend time with the people you like, let people know if you like them, help people improve if you see any [...]

If we dare the difference, the difference will deliver..

October 29th, 2018|Comments Off on If we dare the difference, the difference will deliver..

We are about to enter New Year, 2019. In a few days we will take a step in the future from the present. But there are certain incomplete tasks that we for one more time aim to achieve in the coming new year. While listing the many global issues, women in leadership gained my most attention. On this particular weekend I was juggling the almost impossible task of being a working parent. In my case, work is being a leader of an organization which is even younger than my elder son, while also being a single mom and a pretty confused young woman struggling with issues of power and self-worth and voice. I don’t know if you are like me, but I am representing the part of the world where a girl child is either killed in the name of honor or if manages to soar her wings is handled very differently in the name of culture, religion and above all man chauvinism. Becoming a corporate leader in Pakistan alone was an achievement but I’m constantly questioned by my inner self that have I made the difference? Whether it takes the form of leading in a relationship, or running a business entity, leadership is deciding what matters, what to prioritize, how to engage others, how to deal with conflict and to take a stand- sometimes unpopular one. Let me remind you all of a well-known puzzle. A young boy is involved in a traffic accident, and is immediately rushed to the hospital for urgent surgery. In the bustle and chaos of the hospital environment, the surgeon strides into the operating room. Think of a quintessential surgeon—brimming with confidence and authority, one who knows instinctively how to take charge. Yet this distinguished surgeon looks down at the boy and gasps, saying: “I can’t operate on this boy… it’s my son”. Indeed, the boy is the surgeon’s son. Yet the surgeon is not the boy’s father. Who then? It is simple—the surgeon is a she, she is the boy’s mother. But the irony is that plenty of educated people—even educated and erudite women—do not see this at first blush. They puzzle over it and circle around it; suggesting uncle, grandfather, stepfather—answers that really make little sense. Unfortunately, this is the rub. When it comes to thinking about women in powerful positions, we are too often blinded by the daggers of the mind, infected by the malignant mind bugs that mire us in the prejudices of the past. You know this. It is what you fight on a daily basis all over the world. It represents struggle as a woman leader in many organizations, where they could see important changes needed to be made, what would happen if we don’t make those changes. But no one listens; most of their ideas die behind the closed doors of meetings and occasionally they would resurface as someone else's brilliant ideas and women just live with it. It reminds us of Cassandra who was given the gift [...]

Crisis in Pakistan: Educate Women and Girls for Long-term Solutions

October 23rd, 2018|Comments Off on Crisis in Pakistan: Educate Women and Girls for Long-term Solutions

Educating girls and women is one of the most leveraged investments there is. Not only does it bring a range of benefits to the individual girls and women—such as, self-confidence, ability to make informed decisions, critical analysis of propaganda. Educating girls and women improves the health status of children and the economic development of their communities. Every 1 percent increase in women’s education generates a .3 percent increase in economic growth. Leading economists believe that female education may "be the highest return on investment available in developing countries today." For every extra year of education beyond the average level, a woman’s wages rise by 13-18%. The UN tells us, that for every year a woman is educated; the chance of infant mortality reduces by 5-10%. Children of educated mothers study for two hours longer each night, than those of non-educated women. Society may be slow to change, but educating girls is certainly the catalyst to begin it. The biggest barrier to a girl’s education in Pakistan is her lack of access to it. Cultural limitations prevent parents sending their daughters to mixed gender schools restricting access to single sex ‘safe-houses.’ Across the nation, education is built to demand rather than supply, meaning that boy’s schools often out number girl’s, especially in rural areas. For the average girl, school is either too far, too expensive or not safe enough for her parents to allow her to attend - even if she wanted to go. Distance is particularly a problem where parents often fear rape and abduction. Increased age, brings increased responsibilities around the home, and with the onset of puberty comes "purdah" and early marriage. With school so far away it becomes difficult for parents to allow their daughter to travel far and even if they are, many dropout early to work at home or get married. In a dogmatic society like rural Pakistan, a girl’s value is seen several paces behind a man, and not beside him. Change will not come with education, but it will begin with it and for that to happen, the Government has to stop dawdling and start acting. Man is composed of two basic elements i.e nature and nurture. In upbringing process, parents have a major participation in which mother offers an ample share. Thus an educated mother will lay the foundation of healthy civilized family. The constitution of Pakistan provides full participation of women in all spheres of life constituting more than 50% of the total population, but the literacy rate in females is just 36% as compared to men that is 64%. The ratio of primary schools for girls and boys is 4 and 10 respectively. Such attitude of discrimination is not new in the educational system of Pakistan. Pakistan inherited it from the history. After 1857 when Sir Syed came on the surface with the slogan of educational improvement of the Muslims, women were ignored. The social setup is a male dominated one. Girls cannot move freely thus any male of the [...]

Diversity..Pakistani Women & Their Struggle To Leadership Roles

October 15th, 2018|Comments Off on Diversity..Pakistani Women & Their Struggle To Leadership Roles

It has been noticed that in Pakistan, women have taken multitude of leadership roles and have overcome the barriers of illiteracy, poverty, violence and discrimination. Yet, the low presence of women at top positions needs attention. More and more companies are now focusing on gender diversity but they would risk misalignment with potential outcomes, if the answers are negative to any of the following for their women focused initiatives: Apart from networking, do these gender diversity programs aim to achieve other objectives such as engagement, performance improvement, personality development, skills development, or leadership development? Have you noticed considerable improvement in women’s confidence levels after participating in these initiatives? Are you confident that women at your organization are comfortable, more welcome, and higher performing at senior levels compared to other organizations? Do you think there are sufficient managers who report strong positive outcomes for female employees participating in these programs? Even at multinational corporations in Pakistan, the progress of women in senior leadership roles can be likened to an hourglass. Women make up a large number of entry-level positions, but often see waning representation at management levels. Top executives will have to recognize that a more balanced management team could help drive success in business. Empowering women not only improves the well-being of women and their families but also lead to broader social changes. Our culture and societal norms play a significant role in shaping women's career decisions but if organizations tend to focus targeted development programs to upskill female staff by addressing systemic issues of leadership perceptions, family support, and career progression, it can create a solid impact on women's advancement to key positions. The improvement in taking women leadership to the next level includes two fold commitment; while the big organizations should have strict check on board diversity, adopt an explicit diversity policy, the real change will be driven by employees themselves and women leaders within the organizations. Building a strong pipeline of women leaders should be laser focused. The HR departments in both local and multinational organizations should be able to interact with the self of their women employees. In Pakistan, majority of the times, all through her life, a woman attempts to present a self in the world which is rejected over and over again. It panics the woman for not having a self that fit and this thought of self being rejected starts defining her with hopelessness. As the woman steps into her career, it is equally important for organizations to let her evolve from anxiety to confidence. In our part of the world, women have wings to fly, but it’s just that they are not aware of the function of wings or may be existence of wings in the first place. Organizations working towards diversity programs should understand that One- Size Fits All kind of career opportunities will not bring the desired changes to accelerate the number of women leaders in the organization. Firstly, they should appreciate the privilege of having women employees in the [...]

I may fail but I will rise again..

October 14th, 2018|Comments Off on I may fail but I will rise again..

I wish I could tell you that life isn't fair, but I have a strong understanding that you all know the truth. As wise people say.. We are all failures- at least the best of us are. So never give up striving to achieve your dream. There are two sides to every coin and so don’t fear failure. We know that we might fail the very moment we begin. So I wonder, what holds us back from giving our best. Sometimes you can be so prepared, and still fail. Success stories are best but failure stories are better. Most people when they come out of college want to change the world, want to get married, want to have kids and change the way people are working now. But they get into the middle and discover it was harder than they thought. None of the trees behind them are getting smaller and none of the trees ahead are getting bigger. This is the time when frustration of failure begins to erode the once passionate soul. The end of a relationship is not always a failure. Sometimes all the love in the world is not enough to save something. It is that simple. The end of a glorious corporate career is not always a failure. Sometimes all the commitment in the world is not enough to save something. It is that simple. The end of a profitable business is not always a failure. Sometimes all the intelligence in the world is not enough to save something. It is that simple. No matter how bad things get, never allow your thoughts to convince you to settle for the way things are at the moment. Accept that in spite of all the love, commitment & intelligence.. there is somewhere in the journey that you made wrong choices but that should not stop you from rising again . It’s not up to chance, it’s up to you. Why is it that, once fallen, we do not try to rise, and, having lost one thing, we do not seek another? Why? Believe in the process and continue to do all the little and big things to bring out the BEST in yourself. You are not obligated to win always but you always have to give your best. Failure is a bruise not a tattoo. At some point you need to stop looking out at others and start looking inward, at yourself, at your own accomplishments and your own failures. Its only when you begin to look inward that you can begin to have an effect on those out there. I leave you today with a thought as why are you going to choose failure when success is an option? why are you going to choose pain when joy is an option? Discover a purpose that gives you passion. Develop a plan that makes you persistent. Design a preparation that motivates you to optimize your potentials. And even then if you fail, celebrate your commitment that led you to give your [...]

Diversity at top remains a challenge

October 14th, 2018|Comments Off on Diversity at top remains a challenge

A quote by Lawrence H Summers – a key note speaker – says "a society that does not establish pathways to leadership for all of its citizens is a society that is denying itself a possibility of excellence.” One of the challenges in last 50 years is the leadership gap between men & women. Many discussions revolve around blaming corporate culture that affect the differential hiring  and promotion of men and women. In many cases, they create a huge roadblock preventing women from advancement to top management. Selection Process, Workplace Relationships, Globalisation, Internal Motivation are few of the most common barriers known for the career advancement for women. Globalisation demands relocations to new towns, cities and countries. Apparently, this has emerged as a large barrier for many women with families. We still live in a time where the man can pick a relocation and the working wife will tag with him leaving behind her career and start all over agian. But rarely, a man would be expected to do this if his wife has been offered a relocation. Maybe, this is just the smallest proof of endorsing the very common saying... behind every successful man, there is a woman. Perhaps more surprisingly, it has been observed that its just not the family issues; it has been adoption of new cultures and social norms. While the natural ability of women to adapt is higher than that of men, a large number of women have been unable to accept the culture shock and fail in their new environments. Similarly, women may also experience resistance in other cultures to female leadership. Many countries will simply not deal with a woman executive because of their beliefs and perceptions that women are incapable of doing business effectively. While left brain adaptness is paramount to business success, research indicates that longer term viability requires skills that transcend a narrow numerical focus. Although it's an undisputable fact that men and women are different both in their neurobiology and cultural training, yet the differences between men and women are not fully understood or valued. It is essential that the organisations should spend time & energy for more multicultural & diversity training for both their men & women employees to wholly embrace their differences and understand that it is diversity and difference that makes us stronger and more competitive. Life, family and work priorities clash fiercely when it comes to women. As long as women are bearing the children in our species, women will not view child rearing and child care in the same way as men do, and will priortise the responsibilities around it differently. Hence, I would reach out to the few women in leadership roles to take a little more responsibility of their race and mentor all the women that are accessible in their professional zone to pull them out of this dilemma- as a woman, the challenges around how to be the caregiver you want to be while being the contributive professional you long to [...]

Join Us for Our Monthly Business Counseling Session

September 12th, 2018|Comments Off on Join Us for Our Monthly Business Counseling Session

On Friday, Sept 28th, the Chamber will hold a free Business Counseling session conducted by Nageen (Nyn) Riffat, founder of Nyn's Dreams. ​ West Haven City Hall, 3rd Floor Conference room, Noon      REGISTER

West Haven Chamber of Commerce Recognizes Nyn’s Dreams

August 28th, 2018|Comments Off on West Haven Chamber of Commerce Recognizes Nyn’s Dreams

Visit our Virtual Business Center Business Resources We have a mix of Federal, State, City and Local Resources whether you are thinking about going into business or need to update what you are currently doing. [...]

Nyn’s Dreams sponsers the 2018 Camp Erio Summer Marketing Academy,

July 30th, 2018|Comments Off on Nyn’s Dreams sponsers the 2018 Camp Erio Summer Marketing Academy,

Nyn's Dreams is proud and excited to be sponsoring the Camp Erio Summer Marketing Academy, August 8-10th, 2018 in New Haven, CT which empowers the next generation of female marketers. #nynsdreams #erio #womensempowerment  

Mindset Reboot Workshop

April 30th, 2018|Comments Off on Mindset Reboot Workshop

Clear those mindset blocks, insecurities, fears, limiting beliefs and excuses that hold you back from winning your dreams. Nageen Riffat invites you to "Mindset Reboot Workshop" to beat the mediocrity matrix and empower you to [...]

Women’s Leadership Conference

April 1st, 2018|Comments Off on Women’s Leadership Conference

Date: Wednesday, April 11, 2018 Location: Cielo Banquet Ballroom Time: 9:00 am - 12:30 pm Tickets: $20 Conference Fee/ $10 Sponsor a Student Moderated By: Jocelyn Maminta, WTNH News 8 Presented By:West Haven & Orange [...]